I was at a ladies retreat this weekend and at one point we were sitting at a round table and after our discussion we held hands and said a prayer. It was a sweet, intimate moment! But later on, my girlfriend told me how she giggled to herself when right after the prayer, I took my hand sanitizer and cleaned my hands right in front of everyone! I don't even remember doing that. I'm horrified that I did it, too! It must have been subconscious. I hope nobody was offended. I can be such a goober sometimes.
My point in this is that I don't always realize how the things I do, whether conscious or not, are always seen by others. I never want anyone to get the wrong impression, but sometimes they will, whether I like it or not. I could drive myself crazy worrying about making the wrong impression (you've heard the saying "perception is reality"?) or I could hope that others just realize I'm human and know that my God loves me just the way I am - even if I am a wacky, germ-a-phobe who occasionally does really dumb things subconsciously. I'm glad He loves me anyway!
My friend laughed as she realized how horrified I was about the subconscious "offense" because she said her first thought, and probably the first thought of everyone else at the table, was "Hey, pass that stuff over here!" and when she told me this, I realized that I may have made a bigger deal of this than I needed to in my mind. Why do we do this to ourselves? Can you relate?
Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to go wash my hands. No tellin' who or what has been on this keyboard....