Remember the busy signal? That annoying little "Beep...Beep...Beep..." we'd get when we called someone back in the day before call waiting? Maybe you're reading this and you have no idea what I'm talking about...that makes me feel very old. (smile) Anyway, I had a thought the other day about that busy signal because I felt like God was trying to "download" some things into my heart and mind and when He would try, He would hear that "busy signal".
Oh, I know I'm supposed to slow down and listen. I know I shouldn't over-commit. I know I should prioritize. Heck, many of my blogs are about those very things. You'll find in my life that most of my blogs are written because I'm dealing with some things and when I blog it helps me to sort things out, communicate what I'm learning and it gives me the added accountability of throwing it out there for the world to see (not that the world is reading my blogs...haha...but I digress...)
This morning I was trying to focus in my quiet time with the Lord but first I decided I would open my computer to check my email since I get several quality devotionals sent to my inbox each morning. I love reading them. The only problem is, often when I open my laptop, I get sucked into distraction and before I realize it, my "quiet time" has turned into anything but quiet time. I mean, the room is quiet, but my mind is not. I've checked my email, my facebook, my twitter and I've caught up with the world's news. But that time spent, quiet in the presence of Almighty God, is absent and I feel it in my spirit. I begin to grieve. I've done it again. My bible is lying right beside me, unopened. My heart sinks.
Maybe that is why I feel like when God is ready to "download" some important truths, some foundational precepts, into my heart and mind but He keeps finding a busy signal. My mind is busy. So busy, in fact, that I often forget what I'm doing and go off on little rabbit trails in my mind that take me far from the presence of God. Can you relate to this at all or am I alone in this struggle? I have a feeling I'm not, though I may not hear from you because you're struggling with this too but maybe you're like me and don't want to admit it. (smile)
I read this verse the other day and it sent shivers up my spine: Though the Lord gave you adversity for food and suffering for drink He will still be with you to teach you. You will see your teacher with your own eyes. Your own ears will hear Him. Right behind you a voice will say, "This is the way you should go", whether to the right or to the left. Then you will destroy all of your silver idols and your precious gold images. You will throw them out like filthy rags, saying to them, "Good riddance!" (Isaiah 30:20-22)
So...what was it about this verse that sent shivers up my spine? Well, it was the part that says, then you will destroy all of your silver idols...". My MacBook Pro is silver. And it's an idol to me when I choose to spend time with it before I spend time with my God. Isaiah was saying that once you've experienced the presence of God and the leading of God, you will do away with those silver idols out of a pure desire to hear from Him. Once you've tasted what it's like to be in the presence of God, nothing else can compare! Please hear me...I'm not trying to be legalistic. I hate legalism. I don't believe computers are bad at all - but I do believe that when we choose to use them over spending time with God, that is wrong. It eats my time up like a moth on cloth. It distracts me and prevents me from experiencing true intimacy with God. So, at times, it is my "silver idol" and it must be destroyed.
Now, please don't think this is as drastic as it sounds. I'm not going to go blow up my MacBook Pro. I'm not even going to get rid of it - I need it for the work I do. But today I'm going to promise God in the presence of those who read my blog, that I will not open it until I've spent my quiet time with Him. I can feel the difference on those days when He is first and I need that daily. I'm deceiving myself if I think for one moment that I can do this without Him! I need the accountability and I need the focus.
I know He has much to show me and download into my heart and mind and until the busy signal is gone, it will evade me. So I'm going to free up the line. I'm going to free up my heart. I'm going to free up my ears to hear from Him. Once I've heard from Him, I know I can freely open my silver MacBook Pro and as I hear from the world, my facebook friends, my tweeters and the news, I will be hearing it through the filter of His Truth.
I can already hear Him saying, "I have so much more for you. You only have to be still and listen."
So the Lord must wait for you to come to Him so He can show you His love and compassion. For the LORD is a faithful God. Blessed are those who wait for His help. (Isaiah 30:18)